Have you ever listened to the words of the Mariah Carey song Hero? Especially the refrain of the song. It goes something like this:
"And then a hero comes alongWith the strength to carry onAnd you cast your fears asideAnd you know you can surviveSo when you feel like hope is goneLook inside you and be strongAnd you'll finally see the truthThat a hero lies in you."
The rest of the song is an awe-inspiring melody designed to promote the best in anyone, letting them know heroes lie within. The song was written and performed before September 11, 2001, but it seemed to be made for that day. I enjoyed the lyrics and premise of the song before 9/11, and I continue to this day to enjoy the sound of the vocals and passionate tribute to those that believe in heroes.
For me, in April 2021, I owed thanks to two heroes.
The first was my father-in-law James Bowen.
A day or so after my first visit to the provider, I decided to go on my typical walk. I started walking regularly around my neighborhood since March 31, 2021. Every single day and have not let up now for two years.
This walk was different that day. It was a beautiful spring day, and I wanted to get my walk in earlier before I had to work on some things, and during the walk, my father-in-law called me.
He heard that I had learned of my diabetes concerns. I told him what the provider said to me about it, and he understood it because he was also working through diabetic concerns. He had been living with diabetes for much of the past decade. So, he had learned the pitfalls and the possibilities of what come with managing diabetic concerns. But he offered me something else that day that I needed more than anything.
Hope.
In the past, the only example I ever had of someone living with diabetes was my grandmother Niney. As I've mentioned before, her later years of life were not of good quality as the complications of diabetes took their toll on her body. The fear of having those complications occur with me had been welling up for over a week at this point. I was still very afraid, and my thoughts continued questioning if I could do anything the provider encouraged me to do.
But my father-in-law said one thing to me that helped me that day and brought me to my knees at that moment. "I love you, son."
He was willing to do anything to help me, whether it was to guide me through processes that helped him manage his diabetes or simply talk about whatever was on my mind. I needed that and needed someone, or something that offered me hope that I could, in fact, get better and maybe become someone living without diabetes. But more than anything, he offered himself and his journey where the complications had not occurred. He was around the same age as Niney when she showed me her toe and the beginnings of the deterioration of her body. My father-in-law's body was not doing that. He was healthy and thriving even as a diabetic. He wanted to show me that this is not the journey's end but only the beginning. I kneeled for the second time on a walk in just over a week and cried in the middle of the road.
He continued to talk to me as I did, hearing the fear in my voice and my tears that were both sad and happy simultaneously. Offering love was something I dearly needed from everyone near me at that moment.
After the conversation ended, I called my mom to talk to her about it and cried even more. Finally, it was clicking. Because of my father-in-law's conversation, I believed I could do this. I believed I could better my situation than watch myself deteriorate. My fear was subsiding, and I genuinely felt I could succeed.
A few days later, we had a meal with my in-laws at their home. Oh, it was the best meal ever! New York strip steak with a baked potato, green beans, and a fruity salad that the name escapes me now. But it was good. My mother-in-law Brenda can make a great feast. She had been cooking for my father-in-law for years and helping him manage his dietary needs as a diabetic. At first, I wondered if I was eating too much, but that is the key to managing diabetes. Balance is the key. A meal like this, coupled with smaller meals throughout the day, was not bad, and the foods I ate at this meal were not bad. They were amazing! My father-in-law ate as much as I did and even used his Libre glucose monitor to show me his current reading. It wasn't bad post-prandial, immediately after eating. About what you would expect from any meal. The management of his diabetes had become so routine he knew exactly how and when to eat things to best assist his glucose control.
He also reminded me that I wasn't even in the category he was for glucose control. I was in a better position. I wasn't having to use a Libre or manage with any other medication besides Glucophage. I was in a very good place from his perspective.
Positivity.
Being positive was necessary. My thoughts dwelled still on the negative impact of my grandmother's journey. But that week changed my perspective and made me realize some things.
1. I can do this!
2. I have a support system that understands where I am. My in-laws, my parents, Leslie, and the kids greatly supported me.
3. I had an excellent, encouraging provider who was helping guide me to the best outcomes.
4. Life is Good.
I now believed I could do this, and I had my father-in-law to thank for the blessing of love and encouragement. We still talk often, whether in person or via text. Offering encouragement, talking about life. These moments were the most pivotal of all the things that had happened during my time coping and understanding what had occurred with my body.
But there was another hero involved. As I said, my father-in-law was the first. The second had been trying to tell me what was happening for years prior.
This person did so in the most interesting of ways...through dreams.
It's hard to imagine a dream being a way to help you, but when a dream becomes something more than a dream, you have to stand up, take notice, and give credit where credit is due. These four dreams spanned two years and offered the perspective of someone that works to help us all. Until after this meeting with my father-in-law, I had not thought about the dreams being what they became. If my father-in-law was offering hope, the dreams had offered warnings. Those warnings came from one person, none other than...
Jesus Christ.
Tune in next week for the beginning of the five-part segment 10: What Dreams May Come. For now, have a Happy Easter, and thank you, Jesus, for all you have done for me and us all. #HeIsRisen
Today's Bible Verse, April 8, 2023:
"For God, who said, 'Let there be light in the darkness,' has made this light shine in our hearts so we could know the glory of God that is seen in the face of Jesus Christ." - 2 Corinthians 4:6
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